I think that if I just do this one thing this way, maybe my life will get easier.  

My bargaining skills are not really all that good.  I used to pray, God if you will just get me out of this one, I promise I will never drink again.  Then I would get home to find that I couldn't not drink...

I don't bargain for cars or houses.  I paid $100 less for my house than what it was listed.  I tried coupon-ing.  I found that mostly I end up with little bits of newspaper scraps all over my life with expiration dates on them for yesterday or a month ago.  Some people talk about the great bargains they get at whatever store and isn't that amazing.  I have a story like that just for those situations.  I have ONE story like that.  I worked hard to earn that story too.  I just do not care about bargains.  

When it comes to emotional, spiritual pain, I all of the sudden become desperate for a bargain: Dear God, if you will just stop this anger, I will do this.  Dear God, if your will just make my husband do that, I promise to do this.  Dear God, Dear God, DEAR GOD!  

I have everything I need.  I have more than what I want.  I got exactly what I want and now...

I am confused.  I am tired.  I am disheveled.  I am angry.  I am lost.  I am trying.  I am trying.  I am trying.  

Dear God, give me the willingness to accept where I am and who I am today. Amen